Day 235 - El Arish. To the left is the FBW (Fucking Big Windmill) at Hughenden. After much farting and general emission of wind Billy finally had a little accident on the eighth green; he followed through. There was much merriment amongst the rest of the group especially when he took his stance on the ninth tee. There for everyone to see was the evidence of the follow through, a small brown spot just were you don't want one. Billy had been having a tough weekend, on Saturday he had been banned from the local pub for a month. He was a little perplexed, nothing too serious had happened, he had overturned a few tables, thrown a couple ashtrays at people he didn't like, what was the problem? He was particularly disappointed with one of my partners Smithy who was at the pub with him and was supposed to be looking after him. Smithy denied responsibility; he wasn't there when it happened. He had got pissed and gone home before all the troubles took place.

I had arrived at this particular Golf club on Sunday morning hoping to get a game in the competition, there was no problem they had a nine hole social 4 ball Ambrose competition and there was a team that needed another player. I paid the $20 entry and went and collected my clubs, when I got back I noticed on the competition board that one of the teams was "Wayne's Team". I was introduced to my partners and yep they had named the team after me, given my outstanding leadership qualities I could see where they were coming from. Queenslanders don't trust one another; the Ambrose was played with two groups of four teeing off together, so that each group had a marker to keep an eye on them.

If you are playing in a social Ambrose in Queensland do not wear a light blue shirt, this immediately makes you an object of ridicule and the recipient of cruel and inhuman comments. Half way down the first fairway my new nickname was "Laurie" (for the Victorians, Laurie Daley ex captain and now coach of the NSW Rugby League Team who wear light blue shirts). They were a tough crowd; every time I was addressing the ball they were giving me lots of advice like "come on Laurie your team needs you". Fortunately years of playing with Keith & John has given me immunity to this type of distraction. Keith has often chastised me for playing golf whilst he was talking; they are both always ready to give me advice, usually at the top of my backswing. This training means there is nothing that a few Queenslanders could throw at me that was going to put me off. In spite of everything I had a very enjoyable day.